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Episode 1068 (12th April 1971)

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Episode 1068
Production code P694/68
ITV transmission date 12th April 1971 (Monday)
Stories by Harry Driver
Esther Rose
John Temple
Writer H.V. Kershaw
Designer Eugene Ferguson
Director Desmond McCarthy
Executive Producer H.V. Kershaw
Previous episode 7th April 1971
Next episode 14th April 1971


Stan settles down for the night in the yard of Hulmes Bakery in one of their vans with a couple of bottles of beer. Maggie and Irma ask Emily to go through their books for them and see if they can get more profits out of the business. Ray sneaks into the bakery yard. He watches watchman Tommy Ratcliffe listening at the back door of one of the vans. He realises it’s the one with Stan in and drives it away. Ena refuses to go out for the bank holiday and insists Minnie spring cleans her house. Ray drives the van on to some waste ground and leaves the van behind with Stan still inside it. At 3.30am, the police arrive and find the van abandoned with Stan yelling inside it to be let out. They release him and ask him to take a breath test. The next day Stan is furious with whoever drove him there. He has to go the station to be interviewed about whoever stole the van. Minnie wears a “Kiss me quick” hat and buys ice creams, determined to enjoy her bank holiday. She sets up a picnic in her back yard but Ena still insists she spring cleans. A worried Irma and Ray hear that the police were the ones who found the van. Minnie continues to enjoy her picnic while Ena washes her blankets. Irma has a go at Ray for getting her dad in trouble with the police. Emily has trouble balancing the books. Stan returns from the police station, livid because he’s been sacked. He swears vengeance. Irma is worried.


Regular castEdit

Guest castEdit



  • TV Times synopsis: Stan gets a rude awakening.
  • Viewing Figures: First UK broadcast - 5,550,000 homes (17th place). This somewhat low figure in comparison to surrounding episodes is explained by this edition being transmitted on Easter Monday - a public holiday.

Notable dialogueEdit

Ena Sharples: "There's two sorts of folk in this world, Minnie Caldwell, there's the thinkers and the doers. An' it's high time us doers stopped carryin' you thinkers about!"


Hilda Ogden: "Happen me and your dad will go somewhere nice with it being bank holiday."
Irma Barlow: "Yeah, revisit the scenes of your childhood like the skin hospital and the corporation tip."


Hilda Ogden: "There's a lot of mis-contraceptions about your dad. In fact, I think I’m the only one who really knows him."


Minnie Caldwell: "You know, I can do without you when you’re like this."
Ena Sharples: "What do you mean “when”? I’m always like this!"

April 1971 episodes
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